I remember once, several years ago, my daughter asked me, "Don't you wish God would just show you what the next ten years will be like?"
"No!" I blurted out, shocking her. "I'd be frozen in fear, resisting His will. I'd try to walk a different way. I don't think I even want to know about the next ten days!"
I'm still right there. Yet even in a dark season, God is preparing me for the next unknown step. He's giving me grace upon grace to walk through it. And when I feel helpless, He can use me -- probably at those times most of all.
Just twelve days ago, when I wrote this last post , I really had no idea of the winter storm that was approaching.
Last week was a wretched week from my perspective. I watched people I love hurt, and some I love hurt each other. And it ended with a bang. But even in all of that, I was encouraged and blessed. Women who did not even know of my struggle spoke truth to my soul. It was God's truth, a healing balm. I'd prayed for peace for those I love, and it came in a most unexpected way.
Over the weekend, which brought the greatest climax and the greatest exhaustion, I found myself humming an old hymn. God's truth in found there spoke volumes to my soul.
Jesus! I am resting, resting
In the joy of what Thou art;
I am finding out the greatness
Of Thy loving heart.
Thou hast bid me gaze upon Thee,
And Thy beauty fills my soul,
For, by Thy transforming power,
Thou hast made me whole.